Episode 97: Letting Go of Perfection

Are you waiting for the perfect moment to chase your dreams? That perfect moment isn't coming.

Perfectionism has become one of the most misunderstood concepts in our lives. What many of us proudly wear as a badge of honor—being detail-oriented, having high standards—is actually a mindset trap keeping us stuck in place. As I share in this deeply personal episode, perfectionism isn't about excellence at all. It's about fear: fear of judgment, fear of failure, and fear of the unknown.

I've been there myself. From hesitating to post content online because it wasn't "good enough" to delaying my entrepreneurial journey until everything felt "just right," perfectionism has been my own personal roadblock. When I resigned from my 14-year corporate career last January to pursue entrepreneurship full-time, I quickly learned that success isn't a straight upward line—it's a rollercoaster of highs and lows that requires embracing imperfection along the way.

The real magic happens when we shift our perspective from viewing mistakes as failures to seeing them as valuable learning opportunities. True failure only happens when we give up on our dreams because things didn't go perfectly the first time. By adopting the mantra "done is better than perfect" and focusing on progress rather than perfection, we open ourselves to growth, joy, and ultimately, achievement. Remember, nobody starts anything as an expert—we all begin as beginners, and that's exactly how it should be.

Ready to break free from the perfectionism trap? Book a free discovery call through the link in the show notes, and let's work together to take imperfect action toward your dreams—whether that's showing up confidently on social media, starting that business, or embarking on a solo travel adventure. Life is happening now, not when everything's perfect.

If you enjoyed this episode of the One Girl Travel Podcast, then I invite you to follow me on Instagram. That's where all the fun is happening! @ONE_GIRL_TRAVEL

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Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction to One Girl Travel Podcast
• 2:31 Why Perfectionism Holds Us Back
• 5:38 Reframing Failure as Learning
• 8:11 Accepting Imperfection as Growth
• 13:33 Social Media and Overcoming Fear
• 16:45 Action Steps and Final Thoughts

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Welcome to episode number 97 of the One Girl Travel Podcast.

Speaker 2: 0:05

Welcome to the One Girl Travel Podcast, your passport to the world of solo travel with certified life and travel coach, alessia Tenebruso. Join Alessia as she shares her own journey of self-discovery through solo travel, while also focusing on topics such as life coaching insights and travel tips along the way. Now here's your host, alessia Tenebruso.

Speaker 1: 0:32

Hello, my friends, and welcome to episode number 97 of the One Girl Travel Podcast. I'm here today to talk to you about something that we have all wanted for ourselves. We have all strived to achieve this thing and it's rare that it actually happens and that thing is perfectionism. So many of us are holding off on doing the things that we want to do because we want to make sure that it's perfect, that it looks good, that it's right, that we feel good about it, we feel confident and everything is just going to go exactly as planned and then we can move forward. That's not going to happen. I hate to break the news to you, but I need to break the news to you because if you're waiting for something to be perfect before you take action, you are going to be waiting forever.

Speaker 1: 1:25

How many times have you taken a photo of yourself or a video, or created content and you wanted to post it online, but then you stopped yourself because you started zooming in. And when you zoomed in, you looked at your flaws, you started criticizing yourself. You started thinking to yourself this isn't good enough. I can't show this. I can't make this public for other people to look at and judge. I'm not there. Yet I know I am guilty of this. I have done this many times. I still do this sometimes, to this day.

Speaker 1: 2:04

It's very hard to break out of the pattern of wanting perfection. Perfectionism is not about being detail-oriented, making sure everything is just exactly as you want it. What it actually is is a mindset trap that keeps you stuck, it keeps you playing small, it blocks your growth, it blocks your confidence and it also blocks your joy. So that is why we need to address it on this episode, because gone are the days that we wait for things to be perfect. Done is better than perfect. That is one of my favorite phrases to remind my clients of Done is better than perfect. So by the end of this podcast episode, I hope that you feel inspired to stop waiting for things to be perfect and to just take action and get started. So let's get into it.

Speaker 1: 3:01

So first, let's talk about why perfectionism holds us back. So perfectionism comes from fear the fear of being judged, the fear of doing something wrong, the fear of failure, the fear of the unknown, and because of that fear of something not being perfect, it holds us back. For example, maybe you wanted to go on a solo trip, but you don't know the language, you aren't familiar with the currency, you've never traveled overseas by yourself before All of those things, because you're so focused on the things that you aren't prepared for or you don't know fluently or you're not familiar with, and you're focused on all of that lack. That's what's stopping you from moving forward. Let's go back to sharing content online.

Speaker 1: 3:55

I am guilty of this, I know it. I spend an hour creating a reel and then I go to post it and then I start criticizing myself and I think to myself this isn't good enough. This doesn't make sense. This doesn't look like the person's video that I saw 30 days ago. Just the comparison of our starting point. Because let me remind you of something Nobody starts anything as an expert. We are all starting as beginners.

Speaker 1: 4:27

So when you're starting something new or when you're doing something that you're not familiar with and it isn't perfect, that's okay. That's how it should be. You're not going to reach perfectionism on your first try, and you might not reach perfectionism ever in your lifetime, and that's okay. It's not about being perfect. It's about doing things. It's about taking action, it's about trying and experimenting and pivoting. That's where the growth happens, and by focusing on what you might not know, or that it's not good enough, or overthinking. All of that is just leading to stress and missed opportunities and you're delaying your growth. You're holding yourself back you, you, nobody else. You are holding yourself back. So what are you going to do about it? Are you ready to release that perfectionism? It Are you ready to release that perfectionism?

Speaker 1: 5:24

I can tell you that in my own personal life, I have allowed perfectionism to hold me back in the past. I wanted to wait until I was the right body size, I was making the right amount of money, I had somebody to do it with me, like the stars aligned. We all want that right before we move forward, knowing that there's no failing, which really isn't true. Right, you can fail, even if things go perfectly. But the thing here is to not look at attempting something and it not going the way you want it to as failure. You cannot fail if you are actively trying. Things might not go the way you wanted them to go, maybe mistakes were made, but if you shift your mindset from failure to experimenting, to learning, to growing, that is going to change everything. When you have that mindset shift of, I cannot fail at this as long as I walk away with something that's going to help me get closer to my goal in the future. If something doesn't work out for you, you didn't fail. You tried. That's a win, congratulations.

Speaker 1: 6:48

You should be celebrating that you attempted something, even if it didn't go the way that you wanted it to, and what that's going to do is allow you to do it again, to try the next day, over and over and over again, because even the best athletes in the world didn't make it on their first try. They have to practice, they have to put in the work and eventually that leads them to greatness. And that's going to do the same for you when you release the perfectionism, when you trust in yourself and know that you are human and humans make mistakes. Humans are not perfect, but you are human and humans make mistakes. Humans are not perfect, but you are trying and that is the best thing that you can give yourself is not giving up on your dreams and to take action and to push yourself, because you're going to grow and you're going to learn and you are going to become unstoppable. So, like I mentioned, mindset shifts are so important to let go of perfectionism.

Speaker 1: 7:49

So, other than reframing your failures as a learning opportunity, a growth opportunity. You should also focus on the progress, on the journey of your goals. Enjoy the journey of your goals. Enjoy the journey, because the journey is not just going to be an incline. Trust me on this.

Speaker 1: 8:15

I resigned from my 14-year corporate career last January to go full-time as an entrepreneur and let me tell you that road I chose for myself is not just uphill it goes up, it goes down, it stays down. It goes up, it goes down. It is just constantly changing all the time. And that's the thing you need to prepare yourself and be okay with the fact that it's not always uphill, that there's not always this forward momentum that feels good. Sometimes that forward momentum is a low period, but that's okay because you learn from those low periods, you grow, you learn how to navigate and you get yourself out of it and you're building up this evidence of how capable you are and you're testing yourself like, okay, what else can I do now that I got through this? What else can I achieve? And that's exciting.

Speaker 1: 9:15

So remember, focus on the progress, not the perfectionism, and, of course, celebrate the small wins. The small wins lead to the big wins. You have to embrace these small steps, as tiny as they might be, they are still a foot in the direction that you want to travel on. It's getting you closer to your goals, and you should be celebrating every single one of those achievements, because that builds momentum to drive you forward and to remind yourself of what you can do and that you're one step closer to making your dreams happen. And finally, it's about accepting imperfection. And finally, it's about accepting imperfection as a part of growth.

Speaker 1: 10:06

Like I said, when things don't go wrong, you're not failing. All that means is that you need to learn something from this. Don't just say to yourself okay, that didn't work, I give up, I'm done Because that's failure. Failure only happens when you give up, when you give up on a dream that you so desperately want because you didn't have things go the way you wanted, or it doesn't feel good in the moment, or you feel scared, whatever it is. When the imperfections happen and I guarantee they will you have to learn something from them, and then that's a win. What can you learn when things go wrong? There are so many scenarios in your life that you can really reflect on right now, as you're listening to me speak on this. What's a time of your life where things didn't go the way that you planned, but it worked out anyway. Or maybe you learned something from that and now you know not to do that again. You learned how to shift, how to navigate, how to pivot, and that is worth celebrating, because now you are one step closer to your goals. So the imperfections can sometimes be the greatest gifts, because you need to experience the imperfections, those low moments, in order to know how to navigate them and also how to grow and how to problem solve and how to shift your path, because sometimes that happens and that's okay. I'll tell you from my personal experience, because I'm sure many of you can relate.

Speaker 1: 11:45

When I first started posting on social media with One Girl Travel, I didn't know what I was doing and then Reels decided to come out and I'm like, oh my God, I have to show my face on video. Like I just got the hang of pictures. Now you want me to talk on video. This is not comfortable. I really like I did not embrace reels at first, if you can believe that I was very, very uncomfortable talking to cameras just using my voice, like putting my face out there, all of it. It made me really uncomfortable. But I saw that the algorithm on Instagram was pushing reels and I wanted to expand my community. I wanted to get my message out there. So I'm like, if I want to grow this business, I need to embrace the thing I am not comfortable doing, which was making reels. And I did it and my first reel, if you scroll back in time, like it, was not very good. At the time I was very proud of myself for even putting it together, but that was my first time creating anything like that and I was very uncomfortable and I learned as I did it. I didn't post that one reel and be like oh, I'm a failure, nobody likes it, I'm never doing it again. No, what I did was create another one and post it the next day and post it again, post it again, post it again Until now, like now, I'm teaching my clients how to create reels and how to show up on social media confidently.

Speaker 1: 13:17

So that's where the shift happens. You just have to keep doing it until you feel more comfortable. And again, it's still never going to be perfect. I have never created a perfect video, because perfection it doesn't exist. It's in the eye of the beholder right. It's all about perspective. What I might find to be a perfect video, somebody else might hate, and that's why perfection like that isn't real life. Do the best you can. That's all you can ask for. Do the best you can. Share your message. Do the things that you want to do because it's in alignment with your goals and what you want out of life, and that's where the win happens. That's where you achieve your goals. So I do have some action steps that you can start taking now so you can start taking action on your goals and your dreams. So my first tip for you is to pick an activity, a trip maybe you want to create content, whatever it is, and just do it imperfectly. Do it because you're trying, do it because you are learning, and do it because you have something that you want to share or you want to accomplish because it is deep within you. Honestly, like, especially when it comes to creating content.

Speaker 1: 14:42

If you don't know already, I am a social media consultant. I also work with brands and businesses to be their social media correspondent. I am very much in the social media world and a lot of my clients I help show up on social media and feel good about what they're creating. And feel good about what they're creating, and the number one thing that all of them feel in the beginning is that they don't want to create something that's not perfect. They're comparing themselves to other people that they see, but the thing is that they're starting as a beginner and the people that you see on social media most likely have been doing this for a very long time, so you can't compare your starting points. All you can do is focus on yourself, what you want to accomplish, and then just doing it and learning. So I'll stay with the social media thing.

Speaker 1: 15:40

Let's say you want to start showing up on social media, you create a post, you post it. Maybe it's not doing as well with the algorithm as you hope for. We definitely have all experienced that. And so what do you do? You try something else, or you post it again at a different time. There's so many things that you can try to just shift to get a better result.

Speaker 1: 16:06

So doing things imperfectly is the first step of doing anything. Just do it imperfectly and while you're doing that, keep this mantra in the back of your head Done is better than perfect, done is better than perfect. I must repeat that to myself many, many times throughout the day to remind myself. Just get it done. Done is better than perfect. If it's not the way I want it to be today, I'll make it better the next time. It's not a big deal, it's not that serious. Just get it done.

Speaker 1: 16:38

The next thing that you can do is journal. Journaling helps so many people, and what I want you to journal is to journal your fears and then reframe them into opportunities. Have you heard about exposure therapy? I love seeing, especially on like social media, people doing exposure therapy. Let's say there's somebody who fears talking to new people, and what they do is they make it a point every day to talk to somebody new. They are exposing themselves to the thing that they're most scared of, to help them feel more comfortable. And that's what all of this is about.

Speaker 1: 17:15

Right, you have to expose yourself to imperfections, to doing something just to get it done rather than getting it done perfectly. And when you reframe the things that aren't going well or are failures, they're not failures. You reframe them into opportunities to learn and you write down your takeaways of what you learned. That's a win. Then you celebrate yourself, because when you celebrate yourself, you're reinforcing your actions. So that's another tip for you Always be celebrating yourself, always be celebrating the fact that you did something outside your comfort zone, that you took action on your dreams. It is worth celebrating.

Speaker 1: 18:01

So, my friends, I hope that this podcast episode helps you realize that life is passing you by while you're waiting on perfection, and perfection is not coming. You get to decide what's good enough, and everything you do should be good enough. And if it's not right now, it will get there because you're putting in the work, you're taking action, you're learning as you go and you're giving yourself grace along the way. So stop waiting for perfect and start taking action today. And if you need support with taking action, if you want to start showing your brand on social media maybe you want to start that business, or maybe you want to solo travel let me support you. Click the link in show notes and book your free discovery call. Together we can chat about how I could support you and what you're looking for. I can't wait to chat with you and until next time I'll see you then.

Speaker 2: 19:19

Bye, or follow her on Instagram, Facebook, Pinterest and TikTok. Thanks again for tuning in and we'll catch you in the next episode.