The One Girl Travel Podcast
Welcome to the One Girl Travel podcast. Your passport to the world of solo travel. With certified life and travel coach Alessia Tenebruso. Join Alessia as she shares her own journey of self-discovery through solo travel while also focusing on topics such as life coaching insights and travel tips along the way.
The One Girl Travel Podcast
Showing Up Scared: The Power of Visibility
Welcome back to another episode of the One Girl Travel Podcast—I'm your host, Alessia Tenebruso, and today we’re diving into a topic that’s been coming up a lot lately: what it really means to show up. Not just on social media, but in your life.
We're talking about the fear that comes with being seen—whether you're starting something new, putting yourself out there online, or simply choosing to live more authentically. I’m sharing parts of my own journey—from the nerves I had when I first launched One Girl Travel, to the ways perfectionism used to keep me completely stuck.
We'll talk about the common fears that hold so many of us back—like worrying what people will think, feeling like you’re not “expert enough,” burnout, and that voice in your head saying who do you think you are? (Yeah, that one.)
But you know I’m all about solutions and support—so I’ll be walking you through how to shift your mindset from performance to personal expression, how to give yourself grace when things aren’t perfect, and how setting boundaries and just starting (even if it’s messy!) is sometimes the most powerful thing you can do.
Plus, I’ll touch on how solo travel helped me build the confidence to show up in all areas of my life—and how I now help my clients bring their own brand visions to life, with support every step of the way.
If you’ve been holding back, waiting for the perfect time to launch that blog, podcast, or idea that’s been tugging at your heart... consider this your sign. You don’t need permission. You just need to start.
You’ve got this—and I’m right here with you.
Want more inspiration? Head to alessialisa.com and come say hi on social! And if this episode speaks to you, I’d be so grateful if you’d subscribe, leave a review, or share it with a friend who needs to hear it.
Let’s do this together.
Are you ready to start showing up? Learn how to work with me HERE
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Welcome to the One Girl Travel Podcast, episode number 89.
Speaker 2:Welcome to the One Girl Travel Podcast, your passport to the world of solo travel with certified life and travel coach, alessia Tenebruso. Join Alessia as she shares her own journey of self-discovery through solo travel, while also focusing on topics such as life coaching insights and travel tips along the way. Now here's your host, alessia Tenebruso.
Speaker 1:Welcome, my friends, to episode number 89 of the One Girl Travel Podcast. Today, I want to talk about showing up and visibility, and if you ever had the desire to show up whether it's online, on social media, starting a podcast, starting a YouTube channel or even just showing up in your life as your authentic self I want to talk about what's preventing you from taking action, because I know what it's like. I know what it's like wanting to do something and it requires you to just basically expose yourself. And it's scary. I was scared when I first got on social media with One Girl Travel. I didn't know what I was doing. All I knew was I had a message I wanted to share and that required me to step outside my comfort zone and expose myself to the world, make myself vulnerable and making yourself vulnerable is not easy For me. It wasn't easy For me. It was really scary. I worried about what people would think, especially people that were close in my life. I worried more about what they thought than strangers thought. I worried about if I was going to do it you know, quote, unquote the right way or if I was going to be good enough. But I thankfully didn't allow all that worrying to prevent me from showing up. I showed up anyway. I showed up scared, I showed up confused, I showed up embarrassed, but I showed up. And that's the thing Even when those feelings come up for you, you have to show up anyway if it's important enough. For me, sharing my message with One Girl, travel was worth me feeling scared, embarrassed, all the things Because I knew I wanted to share my message with the world. I wanted to reach women all over the world and I wanted to share the power of solo travel and life coaching with them, and so that allowed me to show up Now for a lot of us. Show up Now for a lot of us.
Speaker 1:I know that we put off the things that we desire because of fear. It is common, but life is too short to put those things off if they're that important to you. So that's what we're going to talk about today. And if you've been hiding, if you've been shrinking about today, and if you've been hiding, if you've been shrinking or just waiting for the right time, this episode is for you. So first I want to get into the common fears that most of us have when it comes to showing up boldly in our lives Fear of judgment I touched on. It's worrying about what will people think of me, and you might be worried about looking silly or unprofessional or like you're trying too hard, and that's just common. We most of us, I would say we do fear judgment, but the thing is you can get over that or you can make it not as impactful on you, because people are going to judge you no matter what.
Speaker 1:And one you can't read anybody's mind, so you don't know what they're thinking. Two, what they think of you is none of your business. And three, you cannot make everybody happy. It's not possible. People have free will and they are allowed to not like you, not agree with you and even write mean comments about you, which isn't cool. Don't do that, but there's people out there that do and there's nothing that you can do to satisfy them.
Speaker 1:The next fear that might come up for you is imposter syndrome, feeling like you're not an expert enough to share or post or even ask for that raise for the job that you want. And most likely you're comparing yourself to everybody else. You're thinking that you are not qualified, that you know who do you think you are and that's just garbage. You know who you are, you know how qualified you are and you need to find the evidence as to why you are capable. Imposter syndrome is something that we are internalizing. Nobody's projecting that on us. We are just worried that we're not good enough. But you have to figure it out for yourself that you are good enough and that you have a message that needs to be shared, that you have the knowledge that can help somebody, whatever it is. You deserve to take up space.
Speaker 1:The next common fear is perfectionism paralysis. I am a perfectionist, I am a recovering perfectionist, but having that perfectionism paralysis is real, and what that looks like is waiting for you know the perfect photo, the perfect caption, the lighting, the timing, whatever it is, and then you find yourself re-recording content a million times and then never even posting it. I am guilty of this. I'm sure many of us are, but we're waiting for it to be perfect, and is anything ever really perfect? Honestly, we can't control how people react to what we post or what we share, whatever it is. We cannot control that. So all we can do is our best, and our best is going to change and vary based on the day. So perfectionism is a lie and it is something that we all need to just give ourselves more grace on.
Speaker 1:The next common fear is the lack of clarity. I don't know what I'm doing, I'm not sure. I'm not sure what to say or post or how to do it, or what my brand voice is, and you just feel like you're all over the place or you feel like you're invisible. Whatever it is, the lack of clarity is something that you really need to question. Are you really confused or are you overwhelmed, or are you giving yourself too many things to worry about? Most of the time, clarity comes just by taking action. Just take the action and you will find the clarity that you need. I'm sure you can all relate to the next one, which is burnout or overwhelm. So if we're talking about social media, like social media might just feel like another thing on the to-do list and it might not bring you any joy and it might just feel like you're putting so much pressure on yourself. And that's when you really need to evaluate why are you doing this? Why are you starting the podcast? Why are you starting the YouTube page? Social media, whatever it is the business why are you doing this?
Speaker 1:And then, how can you manage all the tasks that you need to do and still have a life, and this is an ongoing learning experience. It's going to take time to just find that balance, but the thing is we most of the time give ourselves too many things to do, we tell ourselves that we need to do a lot more than what's really necessary, and that burnout and overwhelm comes when we don't give ourselves the breathing room to take a step back and just be. The last struggle that I want to share is something that I personally have dealt with recently, and it's disconnection from yourself. When you feel out of alignment or you just feel like you're playing a part or a role and you lose sight of who you are and you might not recognize yourself and what you're putting out into the world.
Speaker 1:Whatever platform you're using or whatever goals you're going after, it is possible to lose sight of yourself because you get caught up in what is everybody else doing, what is the right way, how can I make everybody happy, like basically, all the stress of worrying about everything else I mentioned can lead you to just feel disconnected and out of alignment, and that's when it's really important to take those breaks and take a deeper look at who are you and what is your message, what is your purpose here and when you have that, again, it's about simplifying things. It's about acknowledging the most basic thing your why and then just moving with what feels good to you. And I I'm not, and I think that's the beauty of who we are. As individuals, I am not like anybody else and that's okay, and I get to run my business the way that I want because it's my business.
Speaker 1:So now that we talked about the things that are preventing you from showing up, let's get some solutions, and the first solution is reframing showing up for the thing as self-expression and not a performance. Stop thinking that you need to impress everybody. Stop worrying about the likes, the comments, the saves, all the analytics when you're starting. Just worry about expressing yourself, and expressing yourself truly and authentically to who you are and what your message is, and then simply just start posting like you're talking to your best friend. That's how I feel when I'm on this podcast with you all. When I'm posting, when I send out emails, I feel like my community is my best friend. I'm talking to people that willingly listen or watch, whatever, get my emails like, willingly sign up for it. So I assume that you are interested in what I want, to what I have to say, and so when I speak to you, I speak to you as a friend, and it makes it so much easier, it makes it so much less phony, like, just be real, embrace all of your quirks and all the parts about you and share it with your community. The next solution is something that I tell my clients all the time. Next solution is something that I tell my clients all the time Done is better than perfect.
Speaker 1:Post the photos, post the videos, post it, even if you do not think it is good enough. Just post it. Done is better than perfect. Because with every time you attempt at whatever it is you're doing I'm using social media as the example for this podcast Every time you post to your social media, you are learning. It is an experiment. It is not going to be perfect, especially if you are a beginner. Even if you're not a beginner, even if you've been doing this for years, there are still going to be typos. There's going to be, you know, messed up editing there's still going to be. You know, even if you think it's the most perfect post or video in the world and it just flops, it doesn't matter, you did it, congratulations like that is a win. You do not always need to share, you know, the highlight reel only the good stuff. You can share the messy parts, and that's why I do love coming on this podcast and sending out emails to the community, because that's where I really love to get raw and share all the things and be messy, and I think that's what really connects you to your audience, to your community, is being real. So just keep that in mind. Done is better than perfect.
Speaker 1:The next solution I have for you is setting boundaries, and this goes along with, you know, the fear of judgment. I mentioned it earlier that there are going to be people that don't like you or don't like your content, and you have to figure out ways to protect yourself. For me, it looks like in my settings I put in words that would upset me that I, if somebody writes that to me, it gets blocked, and that is how I protect myself, and I do it on all of all the apps that I'm on. I just that is something that's important to me, because am sensitive and I do get my feelings hurt if people are mean to me. So I protect myself by filtering out the negative not the negative, but like the mean words that they would put in a comment. And on YouTube, I found that YouTube is just like. I don't know what goes on in YouTube, but I get some crazy comments there. So what I did with YouTube is I block, um. I don't allow the comment to go public immediately. I have to approve the comment, so that's my way of filtering out the mean comments.
Speaker 1:Also and some of you might not care Some of you can thrive off of it and make great content around the negative comments. I do it sometimes, but for me personally, I just like to not even think about them. I like to act as if they don't exist and I just block them, delete them and move on. I do not dwell. People are miserable and they are just going to reflect that in how they interact with you sometimes. And it is not a reflection of you, it is a reflection of them and it is not personal and it is not personal.
Speaker 1:My final solution for you is to give yourself a break, to give yourself grace. Do not force yourself to do something that should be fun if it doesn't feel good. That's when you really need to take a step back and reevaluate why you're doing it and what you are telling yourself what you are forcing yourself to do, what you think that you're supposed to be doing, and really just diving deep into that so you can realize what's going on, but just giving yourself the break lot. I've obviously taken a break from this podcast for a few months because I was dealing with things Basically everything that I mentioned earlier I was dealing with.
Speaker 1:Personally, I felt out of alignment, I was confused, I was overwhelmed, I was just all the things and I needed to take that break because I have a lot of moving parts going on and I can't do it all all the time, and so sometimes something's got to give and you have to just think about okay, what, what can I ease up on? Or maybe I don't need to post five times a day, I can post one time a day. Or maybe I don't need to post every day. I can post three times a week. It's going to vary depending on you, your schedule, what's going on, your mindset. There are so many factors to think about, but when you're posting again I'm talking specifically about social media and YouTube and podcasts, any sort of visibility action when you are doing headspace and you're stressed and you're overwhelmed, it's going to come through. Your energy is going to be reflected in what you create. So that's why it's better just to take the step back and give yourself a break. And my mentor reminded me of that last week when I found myself, you know, crying for three days in a row because I was so just overwhelmed by so many things. And she's like just stop, stop doing everything, take a day to do nothing. And yeah, we know this right, like we know to give ourselves a break, but sometimes we need that permission. So I am giving all of us the permission to take a step back when necessary, when you need that break for your mental health, physical health, whatever it is. It's okay to take a break, and I thought I was done, but I actually have one more that I just thought of. Okay to take a break, and I thought I was done, but I actually have one more that I just thought of You're allowed to make changes.
Speaker 1:You're allowed to change your mind, especially when it comes to building a brand, social media, all the things, anything in your life. Really, you're allowed to change your mind. Nothing is set in stone. You are continually evolving, you're going to change, you're going to grow, you're going to learn more and you're going to want something different, and that is okay. You're allowed to change your mind and you're allowed to change it back. You're allowed to burn it all down and you're allowed to start over again. You get to make the rules for whatever it is you want to do. So if you want to change your brand, change it, I recommend putting thought and time behind it before you just decide to burn it all down. I've and I will be happy to you know support you on that.
Speaker 1:But you're allowed to change your mind, and I think that's the biggest thing, because sometimes you get stuck with the thought that you know I committed to this, so I need to keep doing it and you don't. You don't have to do anything. Actually, you get to choose what you do. So choose the thing that brings you joy, that feels aligned, that feels good to you, and stop doing the things that don't. It's as simple as that, honestly. I know it might not feel like it, but it really is that simple. But that's why having a coach is so important.
Speaker 1:I have a mentor for pretty much every aspect of my life and it makes a huge difference, and that is why I have branched out into my social media consulting, where I help my clients build their brands, identify their brands, show up on social media, start creating their dreams, bringing it to life. Because there's so many of you that have these amazing ideas and you had these dreams for so long, but you haven't taken action yet. And I want to see you take action. I want to see your dreams come to life. I want to see your brand shared with the world Because, just like with solo travel, it's just empowering to know that you are capable of doing something that feels scary but you do it anyway. And then you have that freedom to keep going, to keep building, to keep growing, and that builds a confidence in yourself growing, and that builds a confidence in yourself and it just creates more evidence of how amazing you are and how just powerful you are, because you're making your dreams come true, and that is what I am all about.
Speaker 1:So, even though you'll see, my messaging has shifted, it's not just solo travel. It is empowering women to go after their dreams and have the confidence to overcome whatever limiting beliefs or barriers that they put in their own way, because that's a thing we tend to just make things a lot harder for ourself. It's not anyone else doing it, it's us, it's our thoughts, it's our fears. And overcoming that and taking action, it just proves to yourself that you're capable. Action, it just proves to yourself that you're capable, and I want to see you all just embrace your life, embrace your dreams and not have any regrets.
Speaker 1:So if you have been wanting to start a social media page, if you want to start a podcast, if you want to start a YouTube channel, if you want to create that brand, reach out to me. I'll put the link in the show notes where you can jump on a discovery call with me and we can just talk about it, because I want to help you, I want to see you have success, I want to see your dreams come true and I want to support you on your journey. So I hope this podcast Just start. Just start and be okay with it being messy and be okay with you not knowing exactly what to do, but just know why you're doing it and keep moving forward. All right, my friends, that's it for today. I hope you have an amazing day and I will talk to you next week. Bye.
Speaker 2:Thanks so much for tuning in to this episode of the one girl travel podcast. If you're enjoying the show, please feel free to rate, subscribe and leave a review wherever you listen to your podcasts. You can find out more about your host on our website, onegirltravelcom, or follow her on Instagram, facebook, pinterest and TikTok. Thanks again for tuning in and we'll catch you in the next episode.
